A friend gave this photo to me for Christmas 2009:
I have had the luxury of an unbelievable set of life-experiences. The fact that I have almost nothing to show for it, in the material world, has many reasons, I think... One of them I learned tonight... It is that we are not always in complete control of our own destiny, because greater forces of Universal Balance are concerned in our lives. Yes, yes, yes, our own blind-spots do 'program' the learning experiences that we go through in our incarnations in the material world... All of the negative ones are unnecessary, in my opinion, since I truly know that universal creation / consciousness, can only 'create' consciousness, or even 'be' creative, IF it is all good, with no evil intent in it, as described by Chang Po-Tuan (Tzu Yang), in his Classic / Path-way, Understanding Reality, Taoist Classics, vol. 2, translated by the wonderful Thomas Cleary, PhD. If each one of us is NOT doing as the Universe itself DOES, then consciousness itself becomes meaningless and causes needless suffering... For me, that's straight deductive logic, with no argument. The Universe has all the power, we are just its seedlings. We can either choose to move WITH it, or thwart ourselves by bucking it... I suppose you could say, I chose 'The high road,' in this regard, in that I have made many choices to move WITH the Universe over many lifetimes of experience... Doing that, causes an unexplainable, and unseen 'power,' that is no power, but a conduit to what the Universe is already doing...
I always claimed my own privacy and personal doing of this work, throughout lifetimes, because I could NEVER explain it to anyone else. Finding the Taoist Classics in the Summer of 2004, finally gave me the WORDS to explain what my soul was already doing, as FACTS of the Universe, undeniably. I found it in the short and powerful Commentary on the Classic on Yin Convergence, by the incredible, be-loved scholar Liu-i Ming, Taoist Classics, vol. 3, trans. Cleary, PhD. What I did not know about humanity, is that for the most part, they had not known of these truths, forgot them, did not believe they work, or, they were hidden from humanity, because humanity is so faithless and belligerent toward even their own material reality, that they can cause extremely unfathomable harm to humans who are attempting to become 'real humans,' as the texts explain, or attain an at-one-ment with internal and external 'nature,' of the 'self' that 'nature' has 'created,' and in Taoism, attempt to get out of our own way, so that the greater good of ourselves and natures own 'mysteries,' may carry us like dandelion seeds in mid-summer, to where we truly belong... It's a soul dream. And it never has an end... It is eternal love, as we are, or, eternal merciless, faithless, 'damnation' as we each are. To harm another, IS to harm the 'self' that creation has created... Taoism does acknowledge 'destruction' as a 'result' of material creation... But 'destruction' is not the 'creator,' so it has less 'power,' and as one goes deeper into the acts of creation, the effects of 'destruction,' lessens and lightens up a bit... beyond 3D, for example. But the 'leap' of faith is required, or one will not be able to manage self WITH creation, at higher levels than 3D... (just the facts, jack !)
We are each a 'christ,' and we are each a 'heaven,' as we are 'below,' so may we find ourselves to be greater in our goodness and faithfulness of benevolence, 'above.' No one can 'SEE' this 'attraction,' and 'magnetic' to Universal Law, in 'physical' reality. (They might be able to 'hear' it in frequency as I sadly found out in this lifetime, and be threatened by IT...) In fact, I recently realized, from befriending a psychic 'werewolf,' of all the most amazing surprises to me, that 'anger,' 'blame,' 'manipulation,' 'evil,' causes a 'density of consciousness,' where one cannot at all 'see' beyond one's own highest level of incompetence, and all of us have that trivial problem at every level of working with the Universe... The reason is because it is unfathomably deep inside the figurative and literal black hole of the 'subconscious' one-true-mind, from which all 'creation,' or unconditional love is drawn out into being. All of it is love. Once you know this, you begin to do it too. Why wouldn't you ? Well, the harsh lessons of physicality, do teach us not to burn ourselves, for one thing. It's just kind of universal in that way, 'teaching' us that no one is to 'blame,' really, for anything, except our own non-understanding of the love and tolerance that is freely found within the 'self,' when we learn to align with our greater goodness. Into the 'self' is really the only place you can ever 'go.' (It sounds really boring to those who have no desire to work with it this way, which is fine. But it is definitely NOT BORING... :) The words that become actions are just a guide-post for humans to follow, to learn not to burn themselves... at all levels. Either we learn, or we don't. Always know in such a 'yin-yang' universe, to keep at least one eye on your back, as dragonflies do... And always keep working through the best you can, with where you find yourself, and who you truly are. Your sincerity will become so delicate, that you would never take it out and try to explain it to someone else if they had not done the work for themselves. Who would believe you anyway...
Finally ? Finally, the 'power' of the universe becomes so good upon you, that you do not need 3D, but you realize it wants to keep you, because it needs you... But you are learning not to burn yourself... Why would you let a reality that mistreats your self-knowledge, and completely misunderstands what you are doing and who you are, EVER 'burn' you again... Your 'power' becomes great enough in 'good,' in order to let go of what EVER has the potential to harm you, if you really WANT to. You will. Your 'love' for people and things, what you might call 'beauty,' or 'personal love' for example is what will bring you back, in order to realize that 'beauty' is only a perception of the inner self seeing itself in the outer reality... That's the dangerous part of external 'beauty.' It is not the 'real,' rather it is your perception that is the only real reflection of the 'beauty,' i.e., your 'love' for being able to recognize 'beauty.' Who's perception is it ? Well, yours, but also the greater creators, all of it. If you offer equally back to 'the creator' what you call 'yours,' it returns ten-and-more-fold... That's just 'faithfulness,' and humility before the ominous universe. Let it cradle you, if only you will learn how to let it do so, by getting out of your own way, and giving mercy and love to the real self, not the 'thinking' self... Turn on the auto-pilot of the Taoist Flower. Practice it, and it will turn itself on FOR you ! When you begin to fathom its real depth is already in total, inside you, it has a tendency to kind of blow the lid off of 'reality' as we know it. It deepens love for self, which is all the creator 'wants,' your conscious recognition, that triggers friendship, loyalty to faithfulness, and finally a trust in your own benevolence toward 'your' self, that is exactly like it... Then, 'you,' can let go of everything, and just be in it, with this very real, very loving creation that actually does respect you, if you respect it...
One exercise that helped me with this was learning to put the feeling of my physical body inside my heart chakra: deep void rectangle darkness, an emerald crystalline rectangle, a hot pink 'something' (don't know what / j'en sais quoi) rectangle on top of the green, and a steaming deep purple mist heart-shape on top of that, is what happened to me. When I put my physical body 'in' that triple 'fire' of light within me, it brought the mind and body much closer together, less 'separation,' or 'un-reality.' I don't think I can explain it anymore than that.
For me, I still feel there are great mistakes, or selfishnesses in this universe by the less-conscious ones who wield great 'power' OVER others. It's sort of like me out in nature, suddenly not wanting to kill even an ant with my bike-tire, and realizing how impossible that might be for the rest of my life. The good part is this: It's your INTENT that actually does it. Right intent, or intent NOT TO DO ANY HARMS, is what causes right subconscious ACTION, AUTO-PILOT 'goodness.' (The subconscious is a programmable, maleable, 'substance,' but ONLY will it behave easily, if you program it with 'right desire' for your individual self... Other people's desires are not 'yours,' so the subconscious won't do that for you...
We are all in process, and we are all at different levels, so don't worry or want what others 'have,' or say you 'should' want. I was a 'truth-seeker' in this life, and that is ALL I came for, for me, and every single action I have ever made in my life was for that purpose for me to grow, and learn what I needed to know, and it was terribly confusing at times, but I abided, and I actually got somewhere with all the social dilemna's around me, personal and public, to my extreme surprise... It did take a long time, and all my best efforts, even more than I ever knew I had in me... I did not 'do it,' IT DID IT for me... because I strove for 'why's' and for 'self-love,' and against harm toward myself from 'others,' which I still do not understand. But I try not to look at what they are looking at, because it is their truth, and their 'desire,' to see it their own way, and not my own, and their truth can never be true for me. First and foremost because it was never the truth of reality to begin with... I tried to make that clear to every single person I have met in being who I really am... Some, thankfully, completely understood. Those who did not, I could do nothing about, anyway...
I was going to also write about my incredible life-experiences, but after saying all that, I think it's incredible enough to know that much, about the great Tao human... I'm in awe of it. But I do not 'chase' it. When you do the 'work,' it exponentiates itself, and amazingly, IT comes to find you... It's a whole lot to take on, I know... But it makes you know, that you are always in process of right process, at least...
~love, kim / lotusalivelight
IF THE 'LIGHT TRAJECTORY' / HISTORY HAS BEEN THIS OVER-POWERINGLY MURDEROUS FOR THIS LONG, AND WE HAVE THE ABILITY TO SEE IT, AND CORRECT IT TO INCLUDE, 'THE SACRED FEMININE,' INSTEAD OF JEALOUSY THAT IS IMBECILIC, WITH ANGRY MALES HIDING BEHIND WOMEN WHO RAPE THEIR DAUGHTERS, SO AS TO MAINTAIN 'EGOIC' UN-REALITY, THEN WHY DON'T WE AT LEAST TRY TO CHANGE THIS LIGHT TRAJECTORY / HISTORY TO ONE THAT INCLUDES OUR TRUST AND LOVE. THAT IS THE ONLY WAY IT WILL EVER CHANGE: FROM THE INSIDE OUT.
ALL BLAME IS RELINQUISHED IN THIS WAY.
Also, doing this, changes all 'light / colors / and even space and 'darkness' into benevolence and justful equality with Nature and Life. When it kicks in for us, all, after we do a little bit, altogether, we will have done no harms, and we will find it loves us back... (for once.) (Hang on ! It's gonna be really fun, when WE can LET it do the greater positive...)
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